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A simple Polaroid placed on our Christmas tree in lieu of an ornament has slowly become our favorite yearly decoration. It takes a while to discover new traditions and for new traditions to find you. How does one create new holiday traditions while still honoring the traditions past?Īs the kids got older, and we all grew closer, I learned that the best gift for any blended family is time.
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I was scared to step on the toes of lost traditions and had no idea how to craft our own. The truth is, I was terrified that our new family was too new. When a family changes through separation, divorce, or death, the predictability of holiday traditions is suddenly gone. Hating the food herself, but loving that she could make it just the way his grandmother did. The smell of my mother cooking up a Norwegian Kumla for my dad. It was knowing that every year we’d unpack the same ornaments to decorate a tree that we purchased from the same farm as the year before or that we’d listen to Amy Grant’s Christmas album. I began to think about what excited me about the holidays when I was a kid - and it wasn’t the presents. That’s a lot of literal holiday baggage for a child to carry. Case in point: I didn’t realize that year that the girls had mentioned to all of their family members that they wanted new suitcases so they wound up receiving three pieces of luggage. When you’re a kid in a blended family, you have other relatives to visit during the holidays, so celebrations and gifts can easily all blend together. Even those suitcases didn’t get used more than once. Crafts end up in the trash almost as fast as those stale off-the-shelf gingerbread houses. “When a family changes through separation, divorce, or death, the predictability of holiday traditions is suddenly gone.” Not about the trip of course, but about all the over-the-top gestures that I’d obsessed over each year. Who needs Santa when you got Ol’ Saint Stepmom rocking around the Christmas tree? Surely, this would make it a Christmas they’d never forget.
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On Christmas morning, the girls opened embroidered suitcases each containing a poem that surprised them with a family trip to Mexico.
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I’d completely missed out on over-the-top memorable activities! Like a Hallmark movie Christmas starlet in holiday heat, I made sure we crafted ugly Christmas sweaters, decorated gingerbread houses, and I even organized a Christmas morning scavenger hunt, complete with custom hot cocoa cups and Santa hats.Ī year later, I knew I had to dream bigger. The following year, I realized the mistake I’d made by only focusing my attention on gifts. I’d buy their love and adoration one pair of Steve Madden shoes and fruity-scented body splash at a time.